OMG! Do we really understand what we have decided to do by accepting the hand of a man from Ghana? It is exotic, sounds exciting, but do you really understand this journey you and your Ebony Prince have embarked upon? You had some great times visiting him in Ghana - you feel in your spirit he is the man of your dreams - the man God has sent to complete your life. You have gone through the tedious and stressful visa journey - spent thousands and thousands of dollars - now you are living as husband and wife in the great USA.
Today is February 20, 2011 - the first day of this blog. Me and my husband are still waiting for his visa process to be completed. In the process of our long journey I have met several cool sisters who are either at the same place where I am or they have brought them men home to the US. Some cases, the love is strong and still prevails - others were not as lucky - but, that's how marriage can go no matter the background. But, the one thing that has been consistent with each of these sisters whose husbands have arrived to the states - they realized that there was a lot they didn't understand about their man - so much to learn.
By the requests of a few of these sisters I decided to start a blog where they can share their experiences (anonymously of course) in an effort to help the rest of us in our preparation for our husbands. God knows we all want our marriage to work and what we go through in the visa process is an indication of how hard we are willing to work and sacrifice for our marriage.
I am ready to learn - let the stories begin...
Not too long ago someone posted in the Ghana portal on Visa Journey that one thing that might adversely impact your marriage to a Ghanaian husband is if he is actively involved with Ghanaians in your local community. What? I need to understand this one better - I don't want rumors or accusations. Why could this be an issue? I believe the person who made the comment said something about the Ghanaians would try to break up your marriage. If that is possible than I probably married the wrong man. Again - I would like to hear another real life perspective. My husband will definitely be connected to his people when he gets here - that's one of the things that I think will be helpful to him in his transition. In addition, he is a Muslim and if I were him I would want to be connected to people of my faith from my country. Wassup with that point of view??
ReplyDeleteOk, so I was just reminded that this journey is a two-way street. It is not about a Ghanaian becoming an American - it is about a Ghanaian and American couple becoming a strong couple. With that in mind there is a lot for us Americans to learn in respect of our spouses. I have been to Ghana twice - eaten fufu and enjoyed. Now I find out from one of my American sisters that I was not suppose to chew the fufu - dagnabit!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the blog site. It is much needed for support for anyone married to a Ghanaian. I for one am appreciative. The jury is out on whether or not my husband being in a Ghanaian community is positive or negative. So far he has not been here long and what his family members have told him that are here is that Black American woman are difficult. He does not speak in English when on the phone, although when we had marriage counseling in Ghana by our pastor he suggest showing respect by speaking in English since they all speak English. He was not happy that I was joining this blog..but I told him it was better than speaking to family and friends who may not offer support based on some of my thoughts and concerns...So here I am. The first week he was here was full of up's and down's...both of us having to adjust from being single to married although I visited numerous times and we had our own apartment. I was vacation wife in Ghana and now I am a working wife, mother and community activist. Explaining budget even though discussed before and defining family in terms of expectations has been a challenge even though all these things were discussed prior and during the marriage. The road seems bumpy and I am prayerful as I know so many marriages that have failed with individuals I knew personally married to African men...So I am prayerful that this site is helpful to everyone who participates... signed...Trying2b..Successful!
ReplyDeleteWhen I read this comment I feel as though I type this myself.
DeleteHow do we get past the insecurity of hearing our spouse speak in their native language (the one that they are most comfortable in) when they are speaking with friends and family on the phone? I know sisters get pissed when this happens - but, why shouldn't the brother do what is more natural and comfortable to him when in a social setting. What do you think?
ReplyDeleteI hear you. How could a wife be so selfish to not want her husban from ghana to not speak in his native tongue. I love that u share the same thinking as i do. I know that is one of the things that really put a spark in our relationship is his deep rich culture! Instead of feeling left out ladies let's engage with our husbands in accepting their culture. You'll find it will bring u closer together!
DeleteI don't think the insecurities would exist if the conversation did not involve ones spouse. In several cases my husband was talking about me, or others were talking about me when I am in the room with them. Then to hear the information later second hand and not be able to respond is not fair...e.g. dealing with mother in law issues etc. If everyone speaks English then speak English. When in Rome do as the Romans....Are they not trying to teach us their language? In addition let us try to have a personal conversation with someone and they do not understand all that was said.....hmmm we are then questioned to death. Finally, I would not do something that would make my husband uncomfortable no matter what my reason for doing it is...(i.e. I am more comfortable doing X over Y). Ultimately, my only concern is building a relationship that is comfortable for my spouse and if it involves simply speaking in English by slowing up my dialect (as many of us do so they understand) then this is what marriage is...scarifice
ReplyDeleteA side note to my last post.. We had marriage counseling as I believe in it now matter who you marry. His pastor informed him that woman in general no matter where they are from want to know what is going on and if he even as a pastor speaks in Ga and his wife does not understand she is offended. So he speaks in the language that is understood in his home by all. Is this then a comfort issue, trust or lack of trust issue or one of respect for woman because we want to be in the know?
ReplyDeleteI want to thank you for this site. This may help alot of us with the transition of life between country living. My fiance and I havent really talked about it much but it has crossed my mind. Where I live here in Florida, I havent met much africans. Only the one from the store I pass by from time to time. Being that my man is very active and loves walking around, I think the time Im at work he may be very bored. Even though I have been working on my home for the last year, remodeling, I am no where finished. I dont want him to think that he has came here to finish my work but he says it will give him something to do. I know that not being in Ghana will be a BIG culture shock to him in Florida. I thinks thats why he wants to move north soon after he arrives.He knows people up there. What crosses my mind is that he will get here and not to soon after, that he will want to leave. Im willing to support him in every way, I just dont want him to be scared or uncomfortable. I know it will be a while for him to start working or to keep busy, just pray that I come home one day and he is still there. We can love each other, trust each other, confide, communicate and have all the security in the world but it wont change the fact that it can happen. He is teaching me to speak twi so I can have a better understanding of their conversations. Especially when speaking with my so to be in-law. I hope that what Im feeling is pre wedding jitters,may be some months down the line. It has been on my mind for quite some months now. Thanks for listening.
ReplyDeleteTo Flor:
ReplyDeleteYour comments illustrate why this blog is so needed - thank you for sharing. This journey we have all embarked upon just ain't easy for any of us. Honestly, I can't imagine how challenging it must be for our spouses who have made the decision to leave the comfort and familiarity of their life in another country. The good news is that have made that decision out of love for us. Plus, your man is teaching you his language - awesome! (Baby, this is not a dig at you - I already know that you will be teaching me more of your language when you get here - lol!)
I am going to start discussion topic just for your situation. Hopefully, some of the brothers who have already transitioned to the US or who just have some good ideas will share some of their knowledge for all of us on that discussion.
In the meantime, focus your good energy on preparing for the arrival of your man and planning for your wedding. Do your part to reduce the fear in your life. A wise person once told me that the opposite of fear is love and God is love. I think you can take it from hear.
Thanks for this site. Its nice to have a place to discuss your concerns whether good or bad. I am anxiously awaiting the arrival of my love. He will be coming next month and I look forward to his arrival .This site will be a great place just to talk about our journey as a American woman married to a Ghanaian man. Mensahluv
ReplyDeleteWhere has this site been for the past few months? I am really having a hard time with some of my husband’s actions. I know he is a very good man he just isn’t understanding how he should represent himself here in America. I am trying to be a good loving wife and I don’t want to hurt his feelings but sometimes his actions are so embarrassing to me and my family. I made a list of the things I would like him to know about living here. I don’t know if he will read this and I don’t know how to direct him to you page. Maybe what I have to say will help out others new to America.
ReplyDelete1- Don't throw things on the ground in the house or outside.
2- Don't pick your nose or blow into your hand without a tissue (then followed by washing or hand sanitizer).
3- Don't pull on your private parts (digging and scratching) in public both male and female. Go in a corner or somewhere where people are not likely to see you. We get wedgies too.
4- Don't talk so loud. It is considered rude to talk so loud especially in the mist of other who do not wish to hear your conversation. Excuse yourself to another room or area and try to lower your voice. (this is a cultural thing but not too acceptable in the USA).
5- Don't urinate outside in public. We have plenty of public restrooms and we do not want you to get a fine (ticket).
6- Wear deodorant at all times and not trying to just pull on cologne or perfume as it does not get rid of natural body odor.
It is wrong to do the following:
1- To yell, curse push or hit your wife or husband at all or especially around loved ones.
2- To ask your wife to do something you would not do yourself. 68 and I owe you one = 69
3. To send your money to support loved ones back at home but not make sure ALL bills are taken care of at home first. Many spouses have sacrifice financially to bring loved ones here and it would only be expected to help them get back on their feet after spending so much money getting you here. They get behind on bills and No love is not based on money but...when bills HAVE to be PAID...what's love got to do with it, if you don't have a roof over your head anymore.
4. If we loan your family member money and they don't repay it back and you do not speak up for your spouse and act like there is nothing you can do about it when in fact during the loan process you were in support of it.
5. If we send you money for one purpose and you use it for another.
6. If we support your idea and or schooling and you let the money go to waste as you are no longer interested or motivated and we are left holding the bill.
7. If you start working and only want to pay your bills and not help with ours.
I keep reading what I have written and it makes me feel so bad inside saying these things. But I love my husband and I want him to do well here just like he wanted me to be ok when I visited him in Ghana. I appreciated him telling the things I should and should not do so that I could fit in.
Many times we hate to admit these things go on and when mentioned we are considered not correct. If one would take the time to add to this list and write things down although uncomfortable and not nice, it would help our loved ones not be susceptible to stereotypes and name calling. We know them - Jungle Bunny, Money, Dirty African bootie scratchers. It depends on where you live the names vary. This is going to be a hot topic but remember this is not to be disrespectful as all our loved ones do not do these things at all but some do.
Sometimes one of the hardest things is to admit our fault and cultural differences but I feel it would best help our loved ones to read something like this than to come from us all the time. In addition they do not see that we are trying to protect them from what will be said sometimes to their face or behind their back because we love them. Again....let's take this with the intent it is meant to convey and not personal. Thank you.
Thanks for the list of things... some apply, some may apply and I don't know yet as my spouse is not here yet, and of course some don't apply... but it gives us a starting point to start talking about it and another persons point of view of American culture vs Ghanaian culture.
ReplyDeleteI agree that it is a helpful list - but, ahhhh - I don't think this is unique to my newly arrived Ghanaian brothers - we all need to check ourselves against this list - and I am talking about both women and men. I know I have some of those bad habits - I'm not telling which ones!
ReplyDeleteHappy Independence Day to my Ghanaian fam!
Very true Sugar Baby!
ReplyDeleteWhoa! Some of those things listed sound gross and individally to the person. Never really witness the first few things as a cultural norm! I think alot of that has to do with home training no matter what country you are from. Thanks for the list.
ReplyDeleteI still agree. Referring to list above. We cannot lump them all in the same category. Not every Ghanaian man is alike. Just like every American is not alike and come from differnet backgrounds and valuse. Not everyone act the same no matter where they are from.
DeleteSheree
This blog is so much needed! I am planning on marrying a Ghanaian man as well. I would love if you guys would give me your take on what "marrying into the family" role takes with your Ghanaian husbands and fiances. This is what kind of gets me nervous. Don't get me wrong, I love family....but I think it takes on a different role. I am also very nervous about him being too much a "mommas boy". It might be cultural that he follows every beck and call of his mother even when we are in mid conversion, but I don't want to be the second woman in his life when we are married. That will be a problem. I don't want him still going to his mother with his problems first before his wife. Can any of you relate?
ReplyDeleteGenerally most African families are great;y involved in marriage affairs. One thing that concern me was them wanting to move their families into our home which i iknow would be a problem for me. Thank goodness my man is not a momma boy and dont believe in momma, papa, brothers,sisters getting involved in our personal business. You will have to have some deep conversations with your man and see where he stands and see if it is something you are willing to accept?
ReplyDeleteNothing has change. My husband is very strong minded man and does not let others think for him. All of our marriage affairs are between the 2 of us. No other family members are involved from either side. Alot times that can be a destruction to marriages by letting other people in your marriage. Alot people like to complain to friends and family when things are not at #1 in their marriage and then they regret it later. Never down your spouse to others. A 1 day disagreement dont have to everyones business. Sheree
DeleteHere's my biased opinion on the inquiry about marrying into a Ghanaian family and the possibility of your future husband being a "momma's boy" - forget the possibilities of culture being an issue. First and foremost, you need to have a clear picture of the type of relationship that will work for you and that you are willing to work for - judge from that perspective. Don't try to convince yourself that a relationship will work if it doesn't feel right. We have no guarantees that any of our relationships will work. However, I believe if you see some major signs that suggest to you that this is not the relationship for you then just don't do it - run!
ReplyDeleteNow, if all the key elements you are looking for do exist (make sure you know what they are - don't get blinded by physical attraction or sweet words) now you need to discuss your concerns with your man. Give him an opportunity to consider your point of view and respond or react accordingly. What may seem like a "momma's boy" may just be a very caring man. Connect with his momma so that she can really get to know and respect the woman who may be her son's wife. When I first met my husband, I asked him what his mom thought of me. He told me that she thought I was nice, but, she wasn't sure about me because Americans always change their mind. Just like any other mother she wanted a comfort level that her son would be in the best of hands - I can't blame her on that.
The same is true regarding the possibility of other family members moving into your home. If you are concerned about this than talk about it right now before it becomes an issue. Work with your husband to set up parameters that must be adhered to by both of you and respected by family and friends.
I started out this blog talking about issues that seemed to be unique because of the differences in culture. The more we talk about things the more I realize that we are simply discussing how to create and sustain a healthy relationship regardless of the cultural backgrounds of the couple.
I am learning so much from everyone who comments on this blog or sends me emails. I realize that we all want the same thing - healthy, happy, and productive relationships. I am seeing that in order to achieve this goal we must not be afraid to talk about the things that are important to us. As women, we just need to learn how to be precise in what we talk about to our men and not to drag our point on and on. Give them a chance to observe it and respond when they are ready. As men, we need to feel that you have heard us and respect the importance of issues that we have presented. As couples, we have to be committed to respecting and taking the time to really understand the truth of situations. As couples, we have to find our way to create our life together - bringing in the best of both worlds and eliminating those things that work against us. Lets keep loving, respecting, understanding,compromising and by all means talking.
i am new to the blog, but it looks like ill be the first male to post. my fiancee already told me she wants to work so she can send her mother money, and improve her conditions of living. i love her for that, what are we as human beings without family? i do agree our loved ones can go to far with things, but no one is perfect. we can only communicate with them and explain how those things hurt us. ladies i am always leery of ghanaian men. i ran into a american woman who has been to ghana over 5 times and is writing a book about all the internet cafes. how these men will do anything to get to america, even act as a woman to get to know people and hve them send money. she had a lot of awesome points, so i worry about you ladies. it kills me on VJ when i see the men take advantage of my sisters! anyway im rambling, my main point to all this is COMMUNICATION IS KEY, speak your heart to your man. do not let him brush it off. tell him he needs to give you feedback. its a 2 way street, both need to bounce questions and answers off each other. God bless
ReplyDeleteKofilovesama - please stay with us and keep posting. I would love it if when you have some time, you could peruse through the different topics and add comments where you feel you can add a perspective we are missing. We have had a few men comment here and there. But, not enough to help us understand issues from their perspective. I personally am looking forward to hearing more from you.
ReplyDeleteKofilovesama I have met some of those "internet cafe men" and it is sad those men know the right words to say and the right women to say them to... some are good at what they do and can seem quite convincing but in the end all of those women (myself included prior to my marriage) need to lose the low self esteem and love themselves. Those men will not succeed when those women know what true love is and know that they are worth more than what these men are dishing out to them... My husband has taught me that I must first love myself and know that I am worthy of accepting God's love before I can truly accept my husband's love and in return love him the way he deserves to be loved by me...
ReplyDeleteA wise woman once said "Everyone in the world wants to be loved and accepted. And the love of God—that wonderful gift He freely gives us—satisfies that need. His love flows to us, and then it should flow through us to other people."
I have heard and do understand about the cafe scammers but not all men are like that. I mean what's the difference between a person that goes over to Ghana and falls in love in one week or up to a month versus a person connects on the internet. Thats a steroetype again. Who says the people that meet in person are true or have true intentions?! Everybody in Ghana wants to come to America we get that. I'm skeptical of the Ghanaian women. Honestly, those are some real gold diggers. My husband hasn't asked my for one red cent sonce we have been together. Even when I offer to send him money he declines. So please re-visit your thinking on catergorizing all internet relationships as "train wrecks" waiting to happen. (although some do) and I will re-visit my thoughts on Ghanaian women being gold diggers and playing coy.
ReplyDeleteCont.. I take that back my husband did just ask me to send him a King James bible and we've been together for 16 months & thats the only thing he has ever asked me for. Even when I went to Ghana he told me do not bring him anything he just wants me in the flesh. This is his response when I told him about what people "think" about Ghanaian men .... read below
ReplyDeleteYes my baby is always the best what is the hell people to think everyone is the same as others do that ever means there is no bad people in the state and why every body thinks all Ghana men are after the united womans money all property is never true each and every one which his or her own intentions .well i dont blame them that is there own opinion so they have to express it .. honey i am glad you have answer him very well and very great answer to him my wife is smart as his honey i love you queen
its great that you respond with a full blast shotgun ms. anonymous. did anyone say all men? no i didnt say all men. that would be the most ridiculous thing ever. you show me americans that sit online all day long as a job trafficking money from other countries acting as woman. my point is they are more desperate over there to get out of poverty. i dont blame them, my point was just to be careful and not jump into anything to fast, i was looking after you, so you dont have a broken heart. but after the head bashing i just received for posting i guess ill quit with my opinion.
ReplyDeleteKofi, I understand exactly what you are saying. Keep coming back expressing yourself. It is very true that the MAJOROITY of the internet relatioinships with women overseas are scams. I have seen it firsthand what alot of the guys in Ghana do in the internet Cafe. Many use this is they way to survive. They sit there day in and day out. Granted, I could not understand the conversations going on in the CAfE, but my fiance told me what they were up to. Yes, we do have to be careful whether we meet them online or in person. Many of them will act and behave in a way to make you think thats not what they are up to. They will pretend until they get what they want and you will not even see it coming. the women wil do the same as well, however they are not known to sit around CAFES. Many of them will go for men that they would never consider. I know many african guys here in the state that will find women back in their hometown to marry only to find out they were used as well. We all must be carefeul, but the chances are extremely higher for American women with African men. Mensahluv
ReplyDeleteI am sorry to say that You sisters are in for a rough road that will most likely end in divorce in 3 to 5 years. I dated a man from Ghana and I have lot of women and guy Ghanaian friends. The guys and my close Ghanaian girlfriend told me that 9 and a half time out of 10, these men already have wives and maybe children in Ghana. They only date American women for their citizenship. After the 3-5 year time issued by the United States Government. They will divorce you and bring their families from Ghana.
ReplyDeleteMy ex's bestfriend(Ghanaian) told me that Ghanaian men Lie habitually, cheat, drink, are controling, and some are physically abusive. My ex was still married but seperated. He had 2 more years to go before his citizenship was complete. Even though he didn't need me for papers. I came to find out that ALL of what his bestfriend(unknowingly to him) had said was the truth! He also is a very heavy drinker. I finally left him, they can be very charming and will do and say whatever you want to hear in order to keep you. But not long after you take them back they continue in their ways that made you leave them in the first place.
Alot of my ex's friends are married and I would see them with my own eyes bring other woment to parties! Their wives would be left at home with the kids. I am now learning the language! Even though he and I are not together. Trust me, if they don't speak ENGLISH in you presence. It's because they are saying something they don't want you to know!! I do hope things go different for you all but I believe that Ghanaian men only marry American (white women included) for citizenship:(
I partially agree with some of this. While alot of them do marry fr citzenship, not all of them do. My husband for 1 was good in Ghana. Come from a good family and life for him in his country was great. unlike alot of Ghanaians his quality of life was just as good or better than most ameicans life here in America. Coming to America for him was a complete start over and has come with some challenges. If by any chance things go bad with us. It has nothing to do with a greencard. Every marriage takes work. Divorce rates among Americans are high. Sheree
DeleteMy husband also came from an established family my whole family was surprise a lot of Americans stero type Africans as being poor but most are not.
DeleteWhy did the conversation stop..lol I just found this blog and I am thoroughly pleased with the dialogue. I'm a city girl raised in D.C, and this summer I went to Ghana and fell in love. I'm sure my story parallels many of your own so i won't delve to deeply into my whirlwind romance, but i will say this.....love finds you when you least expects it and takes you on ITS journey. It makes a sista feel good to know that others have made it work.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteMy husband does believe that the Ghanian culture can sometimes come as a bad influence and based on some encounters here. It is true for some of themGhanaians can understand each other alot better when it come to some things. So he knows his people
Many of them do believe they marry americans for greencard. Like mention before alot time its true but there are some real true international LOVE. Since he has been here other Ghanainas has come to him with alot of nonsense about americans. Soon as they come to him with that he cut them off with the quickness and tell them he LOVES his wife and we are not for play. I have tried taking him to places that his natives go and he prefer to mingle with others and not just his own. He pretty much feel if he wanted to surround himself with only Africans he could have stayed in Africa. LOL Don't get me wrong. He LOVES his contry but he want to open himself to new experiences here and not limit himself to 1 group of people and thinking. If the LOVE is true there is nothing that anyone can say or do to change what a couple has. Sheree
I wasn't really ready to write anything on this blog until I saw your post...Anonymous! The things you say really make sense here. Love is an amazing thing and if you love someone why not help them live where ever they want. I told my fiance'e that America is no easy ride, and don't think he will come here and everything is going to be peachy. NOT!!! The freedom that we have here comes with a HEFTY price! I really do believe with all my heart that there is love between us...not just romantic love, but a love that the Scriptures call brotherly affection. This love is the one that "never fails". When this love is between a man and a woman from America, Ghana, or where ever, the bond will grow and last!
DeleteI am divorced from my Ghana husband. We have two children together he is a very good father but was a bad husband.. My husband was very good at financially supporting us I may say that. American men (mostly African-American) fall short in that role. I've learned from many Ghanaian families that this is the norm for Ghana men very traditional. The bad points of being married to him was that after the honey moon phrase he was not intimite with me I just feel like he was very emotionless. He was a big mamas boy she moved into our hm and tool over he acted so different around his mom it got to the point where I couldn't be in the same room as them. Our children prefer American food she cooked african food every night for dinner and I cooked sepretely for my children and I. My husband ate his mother dinner every night I was really hurt by this. My husband also had a bad habit of passing gas in public which I was always so embarrassed by!! He never wore chap stick or bothered to put on lotion. He owned three outfits our whole marriage refused to buy new clothes and wouldn't wear the ones I purchased for him. We have been divorced for two years now and I realized that our cultural differences was just too much.. Good luck to everyone that's willing to give it a try.. I would never date a Ghanaian man again.. Oh yea one more thing does any of the men you guys are dating bash african Americans a lot.. Every Ghana person I met through my husband had a really bad dislike for African Americans especially african American men
ReplyDeleteI'm talking to a young ghanaian man he is trying to find work so that it will be easier for him to come over to the united states. He lives in italy with is senior brother. I have been doing my research on Ghanaian men and the culture and what they dont like and what the woman's role is in the culture and all that is fine with me and my friend that i am talking to has talked with me about his culture and all that but we have been talking about how he could come over to the us and he is working on it...I'm aware of the dangers of meeting anyone online and other in pursuit of personal gain but we talk all the time using web cam and we are friends on fb and he has told some of his American friends about me and and they have been dying to skype with me. We have been talking for about 2 months and he says he lives me and I'm thinking it's because he's a romantic. He has such a kind spirit and he is so smart. When we first started talking he once said you will do anything you can to help me if i call upon you right? And it freaked me out!! Not going to lie haha but this is month 3 and he has never asked for money or talked about near future marriage so that's good i guess. Maybe i should stay away from the internet all together because it's making me weary of him. Ive expressed my concerns twice about foreign men taking advantage of us women women. The second time he feverly said what else can i possible do to show you that i am true so i just left it alone and said to myself it's something only time will tell. Maybe i should just ride it out...i just don't know what to do! i feel torn! I just commented because all of you have successfully reached your goal or have passed through it and taught u may have advice. Im naturally a protector i protect myself and my love ones so thatbis why i am trying to do everything i can before i get too involved and something that couldve been avoided goes wrong and i an just another who has been hurt. So if i have offended ANYONE i am so SORRY! I am not singling any group out notice i said foreign because anyone can marry just for citizenship.
ReplyDeleteI would like to hear from the owner of this blog and how she is doing.
ReplyDeleteI am married n have been to Ghana many times - once as a surprise trip. It is a challenge and u must stand your ground - respect is universal.
Also, there is a Facebook group called "The African Wives Club". Its a very supportive group and its private - cuz ladies tell the good and bad and get very personal.
Ms. Ife
marriedtoaghanaian@Gmail.com
greetings all, im a American married to a Ghanaian man and its been a wonderful journey. I am not just sayi g this but my husbanad has been so great sumtimes I don't believe its real , but I prayed for a wonderful man and I got it so im very thankful. but I really have notice how we as people tend to want so much but yey we forget that when yu are raised in one place and yu it teaches yu that way and we think our way is the best way but we are all the same at the end of the day, aren't we thankful for difference. my husband has leaqrned me many things and I have him and respect and when yu really love sumone yu don't worry what others thinks, I don't care he treats me just like a queen and his family actually treat me better than my own here really they are big givers and my family are takers. but im not trying to discourage anyone but be open to each others culture and ways and always let him know yu are interested and wen he seem to only want yu to follow his culture remind him yu are fr America. but to each its own . regardless of were we are fr we are all different I sumway or other, God bless yu alla nd try to make each other happy and safe...
ReplyDeleteI'm a Ghanaian American man and I'm really concerned about my ex who is also Ghanaian American. I remember when we started dating she mentioned how her friend met a guy in Ghana and made plans to marry him in one week. She stated that she could never do that. However after our breakup and being in her mid 30s and desperate to be married with a baby her thinking may have changed. However she recently returned from Ghana and I noticed via Facebook that she appears to be embarking on a relationship with a man there.
ReplyDeleteI know from prior experience that that many of these men are simply preying on these women for green cards. I want her to be happy but I don't what her to be taken advantaged of. How should I proceed? Should I tell her to be careful? I don't want her to think I'm jealous. I'm the one who broke it off but I still care about her.